Another thing that I've been doing lately is being a complete smart ass in my head. I often refrain from saying the things I think, because I know I'm in a bad mood and nothing productive will come from me airing my unfiltered thoughts.
Sometimes no provocation is needed. I've just become a very sarcastic, snarky, mean spirited person in my mind. It's almost a compulsion. I don't even think or plan out my thoughts on this subject; rather they "pop" into my head. This could be my OCD (which yes, a doctor did tell me I have mild OCD, so I'm not trying to be witty or something by attributing my bitchiness to a diagnosis I don't have). Usually it is very disturbing images that pop unbidden into my mind, but I suppose that sarcastic and/or mean remarks compulsively popping into my head could be a part of that as well.
Anyway, here's one remark that popped into my head today. Someone I know posted a comment on Facebook about how they'd "get a babysitter for that", as if she would only get a babysitter on a rare occasion or for really important events. I thought to myself, "Oh, like the time you got a babysitter to go fuck a guy you'd met a couple of times?" Because that's important, my friends. It shows strong character and parental skills. She even had someone to come over and dye her hair. Because we all know that a dude who wants sex from you will really give a damn about whether or not your roots are showing.
My mind then creates other dialogue, in a bit of a southern accent, "I won't leave my baby for just anything. It's gots to be real important like. Mommy needs her sex. That's my 'me' time. I gotta take care of me baby."
Ah, I'm just a jerk. What can I say? A bitter, sad jerk.
Dear Rene Angelil
8 years ago
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