Depression and the Snowball Effect

It seems like every time I start to feel depressed all the little things pile up (and up, and up, and...you get the picture). I know that most likely I am just noticing things that wouldn't have phased me much if I weren't depressed, but that realization doesn't stop the snowball from getting bigger. It still picks up mass and ultimately, crushing power.
For now my big escape is snuggling with the girls (which can get me started down a perilous path of thoughts as well), reading books I've already read before--but that I don't remember the ending to, and playing Everquest II. Yes, I am a nerd. Hmm, even saying that sort of makes me feel more depressed and sorry for myself (this whole snowball analogy may have been better left unanalyzed).
Still, I already wrote it, so I will leave it. This is my "sort-of" journal online (the *juicy* stuff is reserved for my pen/paper version), so I won't go back and edit my random depressive thoughts. Just wanted to vent them. Sort of like Eeyore. "After all, one can't complain. I have my friends. Somebody spoke to me only yesterday. And it was last week or the week before that Rabbit bumped into me and said 'Bother!'. The Social Round. Always something going on."

Disabilities- Good fun to be had by all!

I admit that I'm a bit biased when it comes to people with disabilities, especially autism, but still, is it so wrong to not find the placement of disabilities in pop culture so offensive? Am I becoming a PC prude (hmm, not to be confused with Mac prudes...)?



Some recent annoyances:



Two and a Half Men- I like this show, even though it's very repetitive plot lines are predictable. However, although the womanizing, depiction of alcoholics as funny (and maybe to be envied), bimbo stereotypes, and "flaming" gay men pass under my PC radar (again, there's the lack of personal link to the slandered groups...), the "slow" and "retard" jokes really strike a nerve. There was a recent rerun titled, "Love isn't blind, it's retarded..." I'd like to clarify that I don't find the jokes at the expense of women, homosexuals, and alcoholics funny either, but they aren't my personal crusade I suppose. Women, homosexuals, and to a lesser extent, alcoholics, can generally fend for themselves.

3OH!3-I suppose maybe I should calibrate my annoyance and offense at things to the caliber of the source, but I'm too touchy for that. The song Don't Trust Me certainly shouldn't rank up there with Congressman Jeff Sessions saying that students with disabilities should be segregated and punished harshly, but it irks me nonetheless.
Aside from the inspiring chorus of "never trust a ho", here are some more choice lyrics: "Shush, girl! Shut your lips! Do the Helen Keller and talk with your hips". Hmm, an icon of hope and inspiration for generations of people with disabilities and their families is reduced to a reference for using body language to express your sexual urges. Hmm, I wonder how many people who've heard this song don't know who Helen Keller is?

Article- I forget the article, but I might as well mention it. It's been a few years, but (as you can tell) it's stayed in my mind since. The United States was referred to as Canada's neighbor or sibling with Asperger's Syndrome. I guess that's supposed to mean we are socially awkward/ignorant. Not really sure. Maybe it meant that we have sensory issues and really hate those tags in our undies and t-shirts. Hmm...

Never mind that...

You need to be on a topic to digress onto a tangent. I really like the word. I actually have a children's story where a creature's name is Random Tangent. He put words into the protagonist's mouth that created trouble. I never got it into publishable shape, but it could be at a later date. Who knows?

Anyway, I have a blog about autism, which I try to keep somewhat on topic with posts about autism in general or about the craziness that my daughters, who both have autism, and I are up to. That's why I created this blog to cover all of the other random thoughts that I have. (hence the title!)

Which reminds me: I really dislike when people say that someone is autistic. Things are autistic, people have autism. I used to say it a bunch when my daughters were first diagnosed, but it really began to get on my nerves after a while. You may think I'm being too politically correct, but that's okay, I feel you are entitled to your opinion. I'm nice like that.

I am near-sighted, have Irritable Bowel Syndrome, take anti-depressants, and have the occasional migraine. However, no one introduces me by listing my medical conditions. No one says, "Hey, this is depressed Laura," or, "Here's my near-sighted friend, Laura."

Another pet peeve (where does that saying come from anyway?) is calling things "retarded". Again, back in the day, I was guilty of using this word incorrectly. I've since changed my ignorant ways.

Let's say your overweight. Would you like it, if when you were around me, I called everything I didn't like "fat"? Then when you protest, I'd say, "Oh, I didn't mean it in a bad way. You know, I just meant lazy, disgusting, worthless, vile, etc.".

Because that's exactly how I interpret it when people say something like, "That's so retarded!"; I then inform them that I don't like the way they incorrectly used the word and that I find it offensive. They generally proceed to cram their foot right past their lips and down into their esophagus by replying, "Oh, I didn't mean it like that. I meant stupid (or dumb or some other synonym with a negative connotation)."

Oh, well, that makes it okay! You think people that are mentally retarded are stupid and dumb. My apologies for wrongly taking offense! (yes, for those of you who are wondering, I am being facetious)

If you don't get it now, you probably never will unless someone close to you is affected with a learning disability.

A closing disclaimer: I love to use parenthetical expressions and ellipses. (even when they aren't grammatically correct...)